Sensory Validation

This chicken is spicy!
No, it’s not. You’re fine. Just eat it.
But it’s spicy!
Eat it or no (insert favorite activity here).

These pants are crunchy!
I just washed them, you’re fine. Put them on!
But they bother me!
Wear them, or else I’ll take away your (insert favorite toy here).

Sensory Preferences

Every human being experiences the world differently.

All human beings, even tiny humans, process sensory input differently.

You may LOVE roller coasters, but your partner may get dizzy simply bending over to pick something up off the floor, so they won’t be joining you at the amusement park.

Someone may LOVE tickles, and others may feel like you are repeatedly stabbing them (that’s me!)

What might be bland for you may be spicy for someone else’s tongue.

What may feel soft to you may feel scratchy to someone else’s skin.

Our brains process sensory input differently.

We can’t impose our own sensory preferences on another person: Even if we’re in a rush, even if we had a long day and our patience is running thin, and even if it’s inconvenient.

Your own sensory preferences need to be respected, and so do our kids’ sensory preferences…even if we don’t understand them (yet)!

When faced with a situation where there is a sensory difference, VALIDATE what they are feeling first!

It sends a powerful message to your child that you are listening and respect their opinion, whether you agree with it or not.

By leading with curiosity and validating their sensory preferences first, you are building a trusting, collaborative relationship that will pay huge dividends in the future.

How to Validate Sensory Preferences

Here’s what sensory validation may sound like:

Child: These pants are crunchy!
Grown up: Crunchy pants? What a great description! I understand why you may think that. I can even get these pants to make noise when I rub them! Why don’t you show me some pants that aren’t crunchy and are super comfortable so I know what you like?

Then, you can talk about picking out clothes together or going shopping together to learn more about their sensory processing!

Child: Stop tickling me!
Grown up: I’m sorry! I didn’t know you didn’t like being tickled. What do tickles feel like to you? Can you show me what would feel better for you when we are playing?

Child: I don’t want to wear a coat! I’m hot!
Grown Up: You’re hot? Are you like soup hot? Or lava hot? Wow! That’s hot! Let’s go outside and see if we can see our breath. We need to be safe in the cold. If we can see our breath, let’s bring your coat in case your temperature changes.

Uncovering Sensory Preferences

If we want to learn about how a child processes sensory input, we do this by listening, observing, asking questions, and validating!

We don’t do that by assuming or insisting that they’ll feel exactly what we feel or have the same sensory experience we had.

Makes ‘sense’, right?

Free Sensory Preferences Checklist

Discover what sensory experiences your child enjoys with this free printable Sensory Preferences Checklist.

This easy-to-use tool helps parents, educators, and therapists identify a child’s sensory likes across touch, movement, sounds, smells, visuals, proprioception, and taste.

By understanding your child’s unique sensory preferences, you can personalize their sensory regulation strategies, creating a more supportive and comfortable environment.

Download now to instantly personalize your child’s sensory regulation tools!